13/5/2010 - Once upon a time..

I started to write this blogs. Gee, I was so.. immature.

It's been a long time since I wrote my last entry. Now, I have a relashionship with a guy who used to be my best friend. He's the greatest person ever.

At the moment I have to study really hard to get my GCSE's. It makes me grumpy. And it feels like my life is ending (drama, yay)

My friends are having fun. And I'm learning biology. >_>"

~maybe to be continued~

22/4/2009 - Uhuh:) emomood

Forgive, O Lord
by Robert Frost

Forgive, O Lord, my little jokes on Thee
And I'll forgive the great big one on me.

Sonnet 147
by William Shakespeare

My love is as a fever, longing still
For that which longer nurseth the disease,
Feeding on that which doth preserve the ill,
The uncertain sickly appetite to please.
My reason, the physician to my love,
Angry that his prescriptions are not kept,
Hath left me, and I desperate now approve
Desire is death, which physic did except.
Past cure I am, now reason is past care,
And frantic-mad with evermore unrest.
My thoughts and my discourse as madmen's are,
At random from the truth vainly expressed,
       For I have sworn thee fair, and thought thee bright,
       Who art as black as Hell, as dark as night.

20/4/2009 - I'll be fine, pretending I'm not

This weekend Marleen stayed at my place, because her parents were gone out somewhere.

I worked hard and slept little, so I'm really tired now.

I saw Chris twice, at saturday evening at Alpha's and at sunday afternoon at Youth Church. Saturday he was normal and being nicee. Sunday he scratched my arm with my keys and pulled me down on the floor and I stole his cart. Miss him.

I hope I'll go to the musical from school tomorrow.

I fucked up a physics test.

Nice

16/4/2009 - The sun is shining, I feel good, and no-one's gonna stop me now.. Ohw yeah:D

I HAVE A NEW GUITAR!!!!!!!!!!

Yay!

I got it for my birthday, in a few weeks I'll become older

It's black and shiny xD a Fender (no, not like one of my friends thought, one of over a thousand euros)

acoustic

metal chords

sounds great

love it<333

And I have an 8 for my book keeping exams

Yay

And the weather is great xD

Am I manic depressed? *-)

13/4/2009 - Drinking, smoking, drugs..

No, only drinking. And not much. Just a little on the birthday party of a friend. It was cool, I drank a little bit. Everybody was worried bcause I had to go home by myself. Its about 45 mins by bike. I missed Chris, Melissa said he didnt ask where I was. :(  but the party was fun, we ate a lot of chocolate and played 'singstar'. Very erm whatsitcalled offtone/offkey or something like that?

And yesterday we went to the church because of Easter, and we went to my grandad and grandma. I didnt like it, I dont feel great, caught a cold and my grandad was annoying.

I just went out for a walk with Arianne, and we had a nice talk. Its a bloody hot day. Im going to do my homework now.

See ya.

9/4/2009 - Grumpy. Don't you ever read this.

Right. My Dad makes me feel guilty because I want to stay with friends saturday night until 12 oclock instead of 11. Because we're gonna celebrate the birthday of Liek. My mum has multiple sclerose and she can't stay up late. Then she gets trouble with walking.

I have a terrible headache. I have to do my PO for sociology. On my own, because I had a small fight with my partner, now she wants to do it on her own. Because we did some other practicum together, I finished the report but I needed an answer on some questions from her. She was like 'just do it urself, Im not gonna help'. I said to her I didnt like it. And now everybody thinks it's my own fault. Because I missed a lesson, because I had to be present with some stupid thing for music. I didnt even want it, I had to.

Group one Crew was at school today, and Gerton Somethingelse. We were celebrating Easter. Gerton made some beautiful pictures with sand, it was great. Group one Crew performed well, but the public wasn't really enthusiastic. Pity. I didnt enjoy because it was loud, and I have a headache. And its not my music, but they're still okay.

Liek and Arjanne won tickets for their performance tonight in Utrecht. Liek didnt want them, she just entered the contest because Arjanne wanted her to. Marleen likes Group one crew very much, she came listening as well. She said it was very odd, being in an other school and seeing lots of acquintances.

Well tonight she, arjanne, eva, roos, elise, roos and perhaps marjolein or peter are going to see them again. It's gonna start at 8. I have a signature of one of the guys. But they still need one person to drive, they need 2 cars. I hope they'll have fun. I think they will. I'm getting a haircut tonight, so I cant join them. And Im not in the mood to try to let the haircutter come an other time. My pony is too long.

Chris is online, but Im not talking to him because he's not talking to me. Which means its never gonna be an interesting chat, because he is busy doing something.

Im gonna sleep.

7/4/2009 - I wish I was special, yeah so very special

I'm a creep, I'm a weirdo

What the hell is wrong with me?

I don't belong here.

I don't care if it hurts,

I wanna have control,

I want a perfect body,

I want a perfect soul,

I want you to notice

When I'm not around

Ur so very special,

I wish I was special

But I'm a creep.

Yeah right. Creep - Radiohead<33

One of my friends is sending me fucking electro music. It sucks. I hate electro. I <33 Rock/Metal xD

I ate chocolate. Damned. Again. I'm a fattie^^ Yup. I wanna have control, I want a perfect body. I haven't and I never will have that. ()&$*$^%$

Ari is asking me advice, how I hear answers from God. Damned. I haven't had any answers for a looooong time.

And Marjo gets new medicins. The tests she did in the hospital weren't really great.

And Arjannes grandmother is ill, she's going to die. Cancer.

Fucking life. God made a lot of mistakes: human beings. Damned.

6/4/2009 - I give myself to find you, blablabla (8)

lalala I want  you back - Son of dork

fucking exam things. Hate them. Art 0__0

and German 0__0

CHOCOLATE! I ATE CHOCOLATE!

damned. Im losing controooooool (8)

I've been jumping with a rope to lose the calories. Gonna take a shower now.

I LOVE MUSIC. AND CHRIS. AND FRIENDS. AND CHOCOLATE. AND LOSING WEIGHT. YAY.

5/4/2009 - Yay

I survived. At 11.55 pm I sent my paper to my teacher.

I'm really tired, because I had to start working at 7, which means I had to wake up at 6 o'clock. And I worked 10 hours non-stop. And I did the work for three men. Because usually we're with three persons working, the others were not there so I had to do everything by my own.

And Chris asked me at the Alpha if I fancied to join him to Trap, which is a café. I wanted to, but my parents don't like if Im going somewhere while they don't know it. And I had to be home at 11, so I couldn't really stay there for long. Damned.

He was quite annoying actually. I wanted to hear the talking from our guest, but he was pulling my pants and all the time watching me and so on. I might have heard the first three words. Maybe next season I'm going to start with the Biblegroups. Now I'm in the continuation alpha group. But there is not much new for me, there is not much challenge.

Chris didn't say goodbeye when he left:(

I miss him already. How stupid. He said things like 'you can't make me crie, that'd be very odd'.  He's right. Damned. While he made me cry several times. And no. I don't cry often.

And I slammed him. Several times. I really liked it, especially because he kind of deserved it and he didnt gave a bitchclap back. xD Ohh I wrote that about 6 times on his hand. xD

I didn't really eat much yesterday. One small apple. And some chewinggum. Which is about 70 kgcalories. I'm proud of myself. I lost about 1,5 kg in one day. I have a week to gain it again:P and next saturday I won't eat much again, then I lost it again. Yay. Wish I didn't gain the weight, but I'm a stress- and emotional eater, which is really pity.

Well I'm gonna study now, I have some tests this week. Goodbeye.

3/4/2009 - DAMNED

Owwww I'm soooooo stupid!

I totally forgot about making some kind of paper for physics! It's really important, how can I be so stupid?

Im gonna start right now, hurry, I've got to work tonight as well!

2/4/2009 - Nothing to tell really

Hi,

Today I ate some cookie, I don't know the English word, but in Dutch it's called a krakeling. It was very tasty. One of my friends brought some to school, to celebrate she's losing weight since a year. Which reminds me of the pounds I still have to lose.

It's one of my friends birthday. She invited me to celebrate it tomorrow evening, but I'm not allowed to go, because I have to work tomorrow evening, and I have to start working saturday morning at 7 am.

Melissa is telling me all boring stories about her might-coming-boyfriend. Like I said. Boring.

I'm missing Chris again. >__>" But my friends say I talk less about him, so I'm proving:D Chris is really weird.

And today I had some reading test French. It went okay, I think.. or I hope..

And I should be learning for some other test now, but I'm really tired.

O God. I'm a terrible writer. I wish I had Kayleighs talent. She writes the most amazing blogs. I'm getting para. Don't you know what para is? WHAT? Sériously? You must be insane. PARA. YOU ARE PARA!

Damned there are about 16 million para's in Holland. Which doesn't include me, ofcourse!

Have a nice day.

1/4/2009 - Nice to meet you

Hi everybody,

This is the first time Im writing a blog here. I decided to make one because Im really grumpy, because it's my period and I miss Chris, who doesn't miss me, what makes me even more grumpier.

So this is not really a good acquaintance. Let's start over again.

Hi, my name is Sanne, you don't like me though I probably like you.

Hmm not a great acquaintance either, right?

I don't really have much to tell.

So I'd better say nothing at all.

See ya!